I Wish I Could Help Him….

Who are you?  

I think this to myself as I stare at the person.

He only stares back, possibly thinking the same thing.

I know I recognize him so I don’t want to say anything to show that I cannot remember who he is.

I can see he is looking as though he is worn down.

His road has not been an easy one and it has worn on him tremendously.

He has that lost look in his eyes.

The look that says he is not sure what direction he came from nor does he know where he is going.

I am not even sure he knows where he is right at this moment.

We continue to stare at each other with neither of us saying a word.

The anger burning inside of him is only slightly evident.

I am surprised I can even tell it is there, but for some reason I know.

I feel a connection that tells me of his anger, the rage he aims towards himself.

He knows he is the only one who has put him where he is at now.

He knows of the people he drug along with him unwillingly.

The hurt he caused them only fuels this anger.

I try and look away but every time I look back he is there looking back at me.

I look closer and see his hands are slightly trembling.

I wonder what can cause someone to shake like that.

What life has this person led to make him shake?

Then it hits you, he looks like a man carrying a significant burden.

He is worn down from carrying the weight of his guilt and shame.

He shakes from the anxiety he has every day.

I can see the anxiety on his face.

Worrying that those who he hurt and who are also close to him, will leave him alone.

I can see that is his ultimate fear.

He is scared to be alone.

What would he do?

Who would he become then?

I do not have those answers and it saddens me that I cannot help this man.

I wish I could tell him it is going to be alright, but he will never believe me.

I wish I could take him over and make him see the brighter side of life he is missing.

Instead I look until I cannot take anymore of his hurt, his anger, his disappointment, his shame and guilt.

I finally decide I have had enough, so I walk away from the mirror…